Gratitude Beyond Thank You Notes and Pithy Sayings on Coffee Mugs
A charming client wondered aloud how they could show appreciation for a colleague in another department of the university – someone who is sometimes an unsung hero around the institution, but who really saved my client’s bacon recently. It was a great opportunity to thank a fellow staff member in a really busy season of the academic year – Win-win!
Think of gratitude as an art form that flourishes with practice. While we are sometimes reminded to acknowledge an outstanding gift – like my client did – it’s more impactful to integrate gratitude into our daily lives. Why? Because the impacts of practicing gratitude improve your health, your relationships, and your overall well-being. Furthermore, centering your professional work in thankfulness also reaps benefits; your relationships will be stronger, your leadership will be enhanced, and you are certain to be happier in your job. There is no downside to creating and maintaining a gratitude practice – not a one!
What does it mean to “practice gratitude”?
It’s more than a clever phrase on your favorite coffee mug – making gratitude a part of your life means creating space and time to identify the grace and gifts that are all around you, and to be intentionally aware of the goodness those gifts provide. Specifically, identify a moment each day when you can “count your blessings” – it might be during your morning coffee, at the dinner table each evening, on your walk with a furry pal, during your commute, during your stretch after a workout, or even when you are brushing your teeth.
Try this: for one week, choose a time every day that you can ask yourself three questions:
1. What are 3 things today for which I am especially thankful?
2. What is the silver lining (however dim!) in something that is not going as well as I wish?
3. Who is a person who has given me grace in the last 36 hours?
Let the answers to each of these questions come to you – whether they are BigDealThings or simply moments in the day – and give yourself a few moments to experience the emotions that accompany the memory or realization. Some folks like to act upon their gratitude – journaling, processing with someone else – but that step is up to you. The most important part is that you make it a daily habit. Do this every day – rinse & repeat!
Now you *might* think to yourself, “well, I write thank you notes and whatnot, so I’m all square on this gratitude thing.” Maybe, but integrating meaningful, intentional gratitude into your everyday will provide you enormous personal and professional health benefits:
Your overall mental well-being will improve. Recalling your blessings and gifts increases your positive emotions and has been shown to reduce day-to-day anxiety and some signs of chronic physical stress.
Your sleep habits will be better. End-of-day gratitude allows you to drift off to dreamland in a positive place emotionally and mentally. Pro tip: on those nights of insomnia, try counting blessings instead of worries (I do this all the time!).
Your relationships will improve. Naming your blessings will encourage you to show appreciation to others which will increase healthy positive interactions among coworkers.
Your career will benefit. Being known for your positive attitude and appreciation for others will let your institutional partners see the best in you, making you someone with whom everyone wants to collaborate.
Your overall resiliency will increase. Life and work can be challenging sometimes, but coaching yourself to see the grace and gifts when you struggle helps build your capacity for hope and self-confidence.
When our daughter was in school, we had a family dinnertime ritual where each of us shared our High & Low for the day. Together we cheered the Highs and we reframed the Lows. At the time, it started as a conversation tactic when our girl was very small and we were teaching her good manners, but it evolved into a deliberate gratitude practice for all of us. Give it a shot!
