Help Your People Connect the Dots on What They Do Best
When I was a baby assistant director, I had this magnificent boss who was very popular for her people skills. She was the beloved adviser of the college student honorary and she also handled complaining students, faculty and even parents with aplomb. Because she was good at helping folks who were feeling irritated and twisty, more and more folks referred their hard humans her way. One day, she came to me and asked me to take over advising the college honorary group to free up her calendar. I told her I would do it, but I recall asking her if she thought it was best for the college that she lose contact with our brightest and most committed students. I watched her face as she absorbed my question, then she nodded once and said, “Never mind,” then smiled and left my office.
Strength Isn’t Always Obvious—Even to the Person Who Has It
That moment stuck with me, not just because of the decision, but because of the pause. The question I asked didn’t reveal something new to her—it simply reminded her of a pattern. A thread she had maybe stopped pulling because the demands of the job were louder than its meaning that week.
Most of us don’t come to work every day with a ready-made list of “Here’s what I do best.” Especially in higher ed, where roles are broad and blurry, and a single week might include advising a student in crisis, planning a leadership retreat, updating the assessment report, and chairing the textbook affordability task force.
But those threads are there. As Leader-Bosses, one of the most generous things we can do is help our team pull them through.
What’s a Throughline?
It’s the part of the work that gives someone life—not just because they enjoy it, but because they’re undeniably good at it. The kind of skill or strength that shows up across settings and tasks, even when the job changes.
It’s the staff member who makes students feel seen, whether they’re hosting a workshop or answering the front desk phone.
It’s the program coordinator who always sees three steps ahead, whether they’re running orientation or ordering snacks.
It’s the team member who quietly coaches the new grad assistant into her own brilliance.
The throughline might not be written in their job description. But it shows up. And once you name it, you can help them grow it.
Helping People Spot What They Can’t Always See
Sometimes the humans we supervise are very aware of what they’re good at—and other times, they need a mirror.
Try questions like:
- “What’s something that always feels easy for you, even when it’s not easy for everyone else?”
- “When do you feel most in flow?”
- “What’s a task or interaction that usually goes better when you’re involved?”
- “If I took one responsibility off your plate that you’d miss, what would it be?”
Folks have a hard time naming their own genius, but if you can see it, say it out loud! Reflect back their patterns. That kind of coaching isn’t fluffy, it’s formational. Felix is particularly good at encouraging cuddles and naps. Our office morale is higher because of it.
What About the Work That Just Has to Get Done?
Not every task is a playground for someone’s strengths. There will always be committee meetings, room setups, spreadsheet reviews, and duties as assigned (no shade if you live spreadsheets, btw).
Helping your team find their strengths isn’t about reassigning everything else. It’s about two things:
- Naming the strength inside the hard task.
Maybe the budget report isn’t thrilling—but the way someone spots anomalies or explains the numbers with clarity? That’s a gift. (And for a girl who *really* doesn’t do spreadsheets, that gift is crucial.) - Supervising through the drag.
When a task feels draining, offer context and encouragement. Acknowledge the weight, reinforce the purpose, and stay close enough to support without hovering.
Sometimes, it’s just about saying: “I know this isn’t your favorite, but here’s why it matters—and I trust your judgment with it.”
We all do parts of the job that aren’t “what we do best.” But when staff know what their throughline is, they’re more likely to stay engaged—even in the less glamorous parts of the week.
Your team’s strengths aren’t hidden. But they may be overlooked, under-leveraged, or unnamed. Helping your people connect the dots on what they do best isn’t just a confidence boost—it’s a strategy for performance, retention, and professional growth.
It also reminds them (and you) that this work, as messy and unpredictable as it is, can still be a place of discovery.
So, keep an eye out. Ask the questions. Say what you see.
And when someone’s about to give up the one part of the work that lights them up? Maybe—just maybe—encourage them to say “Never mind,” smile, and walk out of the office.
